Ugh, Typepad is having fits today so you can't read the versions on Inland Empress or DadTalk. You can only read old stuff, and no comments. Weird.

So I'll just hang out on this site and bug you folks for a while.
 

Inland Empress: It's no bug. You're always welcome here.
 

Thanks for being so anal-retentive!
 

I read all those links about the great blog get-together with tremendous vicarious pleasure. I posted a comment on Psycho Toddler's blog (the one about how he and you made rounds together on Sunday morning and couldn't find the patient). Here is the same comment, it goes for you too:

You guys are hilarious but are doctors allowed to have a sense of humor while making rounds or only after hours? I've had more experience with hospitals than I ever wanted and they never have a sense of humor when they make rounds, they are always grumpy and rushed and if you don't waylay them and catch them on the run you can't get a single question in.

When my son was in the hospital for back surgery I didn't even dare leave his bedside to go to the bathroom from 7 AM until whenever in case I missed the surgeon on his flying run.

My rule for patients in the hospital, adults or kids, is: for every horizontal person there has to be a vertical person. I realize some people don't have moms or extended family to stay with them in the hospital 24/7 but that vertical person comes in handy for telling the doc where the patient has been abducted to if he is not in his bed and also for asking the doctor questions that the patient is too groggy to ask or to remember the answers to.
 

Psychotoddler: I gotta be me.

Ms. Katz: Glad we entertained you. I hope your future hospital experiences are few, brief, and relatively positive. A doctor's hospital visit is frequently a frustratingly brief experience for the patient and his family. This is for two reasons. (1) Few doctors are willing to sacrifice their time when they're being paid strictly for quantity, not for quality and (2) few patients are willing to pay more to get a physician that will spend more time with them. My patients and I (and from getting to know Psychotoddler, I can also include him) are exceptions.
 

Your patients probably adore you.

I still think the photo you are using is not handsome enough. It makes you look sinister. I just thought of whose picture you could use, Robin Williams in that movie he made -- "Patch Adams?" -- where he played a doctor who makes rounds wearing a clown nose. But don't use the clown nose, use a nicer picture.
 

One advantage to using the Rowan Atkinson picture--when you finally do meet Dr. Bean you are pleasantly surprised.

Toby, I find (as does Dr. Bean) that humor is one of my main tools. Obviously, you don't want to use it in inappropriate situations, but if you can walk into a room and make a patient or family member smile, everyone starts to feel better.
 

Yeah. I find most diseases can be cured by a really loud fake fart noise or a knock-knock joke. Of course the state medical board disagrees and keeps fining me, but they just don't have a good sense of humor.

Here's ball-and-chain's favorite joke:

A racehorse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?"
 

I'm going with you.
 

I don't get it.
 

"I'm going with you." is a line from Monty Pithon's "Holy Grail". In context, it's a hoot. Out of context, it's a weird comment by Psychotoddler.
 

You had to be there. Oh wait, you were.
 

Ain't life grand ;-)
 

Made me smile :-)
 

It's been a long time since I saw "Holy Grail." It's on my list of things to see when my kids are old enough to go play in traffic for a while.
 

get a baby sitter, then sit in the other room with your hubby and watch it.
 

Doctor Bean...obviously you are not a woman...women do not get babysitters so they can sit in the other room watching Holy Grail...anyway...I would watch Meaning of Life if you're going to do that...After-dinner mint, monsieur?
 

As I recall, Ball-and-chain used a line from that movie at Universal Studios, did she not?
 

That's right. I asked her "How are you feeling?" and she gave the answer that has been the standard in our household.

"Better. Better get me a bucket."

I'm a very very lucky man.
 

You know, if you two are ever looking for something to do other than medicine...you could always go door to door, letting people know "we are here for your liv-a"
 

Screening "Patch Adams" is a homeopathic substitute for Ipecac.
 

Cruisin-mom: Meaning, you're willing to feed and educate my kids while I take comedy door-to-door?

Ralphie: Never saw it. It sounds just like the kind of feel-good life-affirming tripe I hate.